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The Mathieu Schneider Hockey Jews “Hanukkah Song”

December 1, 2010

I posted this on my Twitter, now posting here.

I present, the hockey Jews remix of Adam Sandler’s “The Hanukkah Song” by ME:

When you feel like the only kid in town, who likes to play hockey, here’s a list of hockey Jews, there’s not a lot you seeeee..

Gary Bettman lights the menorah, so do Steve Weiss Cory Pecker and Marty Turco

Guess who eats team dinners of kosher spaghetti? the Habs Jeff Halpern and Mike Cammalleri

Colby Cohen’s Jewish, Zach Cohen is too, add Jason Zucker, what a champion Jew Crew!

You don’t need Deck the Halls or Jingle Bell Rock, cause you can spin the dreidel with the owner of the Ducks!

Put syrup on your latkes, its time for Hanukkah, the owner of the Toronto Maple Leaf-ukahs celebrates Hanukkah

Sidney Crosby…not a Jew! But guess who is? Jewish Hall of Famer Cecil Hart (woo!)

We got Eric Nystrom, and his dad named Bobby, Ryan Kesler’s a quarter Jewish, not too shabby!

Some people think, that Evgeni Malkin could be, well he’s not but guess who is? Steve Dubinsky

Not many Jews are in the hockey biz, Kovalchuck isn’t but I heard his agent is (KA-CHING!)

You can’t make the rest of the lyric-ahs, rhyme with Hanukkah, so enjoy this hockey song-ukah and have a happy happy happy happy Hanukkah..

HAPPY HANUKKAH!

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Jewish American Basterd

March 14, 2010

“No,” [Jeff] Halpern said with a laugh. “I hate Europe.”

What an American. and Jew.

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Jew Mullet

March 14, 2010

Old school Mathieu Schneider. JewMullet baby.

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Beat with his own helmet..

January 28, 2010

Poor poor stripping Jew-boy!

Fuck you Fistric. Your name sucks.

Fisty was fined $2,500, no suspenstion.

Don’t mess with the Jews, Fist-a-cuffs. Marty Turco will get you. Trust me, its not like he has important goal tending to do. Zing.

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Sidney Who?

January 15, 2010

JUST KIDDING.

But still, this is sick. This blog’s name sake Kosher Spaghetti himself aka Mike Cammalleri made fellow Jewboy Marty Turco his JEWBITCH last night. And here I was all upset I forgot to blog about this Jew vs. Jew matchup. Thanks for that MCamm.

Anyway, THIS.

Oh Marty, MCamm just served you with a heaping helping of matzah pizza. OM NOM NOM.

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Down With the Flamers!

January 13, 2010

Tonight, the Pens play the Calgary Flames. This is a high stakes game for personal Jew lovers. The power of Moses will be on their side, when we really need Moses on our PP. Shit.

Eric Nystrom, son of Bobby Nystrom, and JEW.

Just when I thought I was done with being a closeted Flames fan..

Anyhoodles, we play Calgary what? Once a season? Perfect opportunity for me to post THIS:

You’re welcome 🙂

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Bad Jew, Good Jew, Great Jew

January 4, 2010

Current status of some hockeyjews…

Stephen Weiss: in the doghouse. humph.

Matheiu Schneider: cleared waivers. demoted to the Manitoba Moose. currently prank calling Ray Shero

“….need help on the PP? Someone told me Mathieu Schneider’s good at that. And I think he’s available. I hear he’s desperate….*click*”

Lastly,
Jason Zucker: livin’ the dream. http://www.cbc.ca/canada/saskatchewan/story/2010/01/03/sp-hockey-usa-sweden.html

The USA babies go on to face Canada in the WJC finals for a chance at GOLD on Tuesday night. DO it boys. May the Schwartz be with you..